Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future. Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. | Proverbs 19:20-21 (ESV)One of the worst mistakes we can make is to turn away from wise instruction. There are many excuses we make for rejecting the wise counsel of others, but the passage above makes it clear that accepting instruction is a gateway through which wisdom is gained. The reality is that even if we don't care for the messenger or their method, the message given to us by others is an important component to our personal and spiritual growth.
Therefore, instead of shrugging off the instruction of others, Christians should be quick to listen and pray. Even if the instruction is critical or unfair, there may be tidbits of information that God is trying to help us see in the criticism and/or instruction we receive from others.
Below are (5) reasons why we reject wisdom. These are areas that we need to be aware of and make war against, if we desire to gain wisdom and please the LORD.
Pride:
This is one of the most intrinsic of all of man's sins. Pride manifests itself in many different ways (i.e. self-righteousness, self-pity, self-centeredness etc) and is typically the root behind most sinful behaviors. The main destructive force behind pride is that it elevates self above God and others. A natural consequence of pride is that we begin to reject the instruction of anyone who doesn't meet our expectations or anything that feels like criticism instead of praise.
Pride goes before destruction,
and a haughty spirit before a fall. | Proverbs 16:18
Defensiveness:
This is closely tied to pride. Whether it's self-centeredness or self-pity, when we listen to the instruction of others through the earphones of defensiveness, we begin to reject the wisdom as a mans of protecting our own ego. Defensiveness is one of the most destructive forces at work in relationships. It places us in a position of self-preservation and places others in the position of offenders. In turn, we become victims of the victimizers and we naturally reject anything that others say as we internally build our argument, defending our choices as just, fair, and good.
But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger | James 1:19Impatience:
Impatience is another manifestation of pride. When we are not patient and graceful in listening to the instruction of others, we are not engaged in what they are truly trying to share with us. We cannot learn from those who we do not take the time to listen to. Many men could have been spared destruction if they were intentional about listening to and applying the wisdom of others.
Also, impatience is a direct rejection of God's timing. Scripture tells us that God, who began a work in us, will continue his work in us until it is completed at the day of Jesus Christ. This means that on this side of heaven we are always a work in progress. Impatience reveals an unwillingness to accept the progressive sanctification that God promises his children in his word.
And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. | Philippians 1:6
Indifference:
Indifference to instruction is extremely destruction. A man who rejects wisdom, because of laziness or indifference, is robbing himself of the wisdom God desires him to receive. Again, pride plays a role in indifference. When we become satisfied with the status quo we are ultimately shaking our fist in contempt at the work of the Holy Spirit. If we're not growing, we're dying. That's our reality. Either we're active in our pursuit of wisdom or active in sins destructive work in our lives. There is no neutral ground. There's no such thing as treading water in sanctification.
Oswald Champers said, "It is a most disturbing thing to be hit squarely in the stomach by someone being used of God to stir us up— someone who is full of spiritual activity. Simple active work and spiritual activity are not the same thing. Active work can actually be the counterfeit of spiritual activity. The real danger in spiritual laziness is that we do not want to be stirred up— all we want to hear about is a spiritual retirement from the world."
And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. | Hebrews 10:24-25Contempt:
Contempt is defined as feeling that [something or someone] is beneath consideration, worthless, or deserving scorn. Again, the root of this line of thinking is pride. When we treat instruction or the person giving it with contempt we are ultimately setting ourselves up to fail. If accepting instruction is the pathway to wisdom, then rejecting instruction must have the opposite effect.
The reality for many people is that they reject horizontal instruction (i.e. criticism from other people) because they deem that person "unworthy" to share truth with them. We judge people based on their shortcomings and therefore convince ourselves that we don't have to listen to their instruction. But if we're only willing to receive instruction from those whom we see as "worthy" then because all men are sinners, there will always be a reason for us to reject the admonishment of others.
Paul didn't say, accept the admonishment of those worthy of giving it to you. To the contrary, he simply said admonish one another in all wisdom. This means that regardless where a person is at in their own faith walk (or battle with sin) as long as they are doing so from the word of God...all of our brothers and sisters in Christ bear the responsibility and authority to give us instruction. And we bear the responsibility of allowing them the ability to do so.
One of the most prideful choices we can make as Christians, is to deny a person the ability to speak truth into our lives because we don't consider them worthy enough. Proverbs 16:5 tells us that those who are arrogant in heart are an abomination to the LORD...be assured, [they] will not go unpunished.
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. | Colossians 3:16
