The Loving Discipline of the Father

“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.” | Hebrews 12:5b-6

Christians, we should count it as joy when the LORD disciplines us, because His active discipline in our lives is evidence that He loves us and treats us like sons.

It's not easy. Most of us would probably prefer to receive a dose of easy grace, without the side of loving discipline...but the author of Hebrews tells us that the absence of discipline can actually be considered an absence of love. Therefore, when we read the beautiful words of scripture, "For the LORD disciplines the one(s) he loves..." we find comfort, because God's discipline is always loving and is always used to heal, help, and sharpen. Always for his glory and always for our blessing.

God's Word promises Christians that they will continue to grow into the likeness of Jesus Christ. One of the primary ways this growth comes about is through the loving discipline of the Father. 

And how much do we need it? We are sinners, engulfed in self-centered and destructive behavior. As God's adopted sons and daughters, He cannot allow us to continue to live such reckless and destructive lives. God's aim is, and always has been, to be glorified in and through His image bearers. This can only happen through His correcting work; as he reshapes mankind into the image of His Son. #GrowOn

Accepting the Instruction of Others

Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future. Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. | Proverbs 19:20-21 (ESV)

One of the worst mistakes we can make is to turn away from wise instruction. There are many excuses we make for rejecting the wise counsel of others, but the passage above makes it clear that accepting instruction is a gateway through which wisdom is gained. The reality is that even if we don't care for the messenger or their method, the message given to us by others is an important component to our personal and spiritual growth.

Therefore, instead of shrugging off the instruction of others, Christians should be quick to listen and pray. Even if the instruction is critical or unfair, there may be tidbits of information that God is trying to help us see in the criticism and/or instruction we receive from others.

Below are (5) reasons why we reject wisdom. These are areas that we need to be aware of and make war against, if we desire to gain wisdom and please the LORD.

Pride:

This is one of the most intrinsic of all of man's sins. Pride manifests itself in many different ways (i.e. self-righteousness, self-pity, self-centeredness etc) and is typically the root behind most sinful behaviors. The main destructive force behind pride is that it elevates self above God and others. A natural consequence of pride is that we begin to reject the instruction of anyone who doesn't meet our expectations or anything that feels like criticism instead of praise.

Pride goes before destruction,
     and a haughty spirit before a fall. | Proverbs 16:18

Defensiveness:

This is closely tied to pride. Whether it's self-centeredness or self-pity, when we listen to the instruction of others through the earphones of defensiveness, we begin to reject the wisdom as a mans of protecting our own ego. Defensiveness is one of the most destructive forces at work in relationships. It places us in a position of self-preservation and places others in the position of offenders. In turn, we become victims of the victimizers and we naturally reject anything that others say as we internally build our argument, defending our choices as just, fair, and good.

But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger | James 1:19

Impatience:

Impatience is another manifestation of pride. When we are not patient and graceful in listening to the instruction of others, we are not engaged in what they are truly trying to share with us. We cannot learn from those who we do not take the time to listen to. Many men could have been spared destruction if they were intentional about listening to and applying the wisdom of others.

Also, impatience is a direct rejection of God's timing. Scripture tells us that God, who began a work in us, will continue his work in us until it is completed at the day of Jesus Christ. This means that on this side of heaven we are always a work in progress. Impatience reveals an unwillingness to accept the progressive sanctification that God promises his children in his word.

And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. | Philippians 1:6

Indifference:

Indifference to instruction is extremely destruction. A man who rejects wisdom, because of laziness or indifference, is robbing himself of the wisdom God desires him to receive. Again, pride plays a role in indifference. When we become satisfied with the status quo we are ultimately shaking our fist in contempt at the work of the Holy Spirit. If we're not growing, we're dying. That's our reality. Either we're active in our pursuit of wisdom or active in sins destructive work in our lives. There is no neutral ground. There's no such thing as treading water in sanctification.

Oswald Champers said, "It is a most disturbing thing to be hit squarely in the stomach by someone being used of God to stir us up— someone who is full of spiritual activity. Simple active work and spiritual activity are not the same thing. Active work can actually be the counterfeit of spiritual activity. The real danger in spiritual laziness is that we do not want to be stirred up— all we want to hear about is a spiritual retirement from the world."

And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. | Hebrews 10:24-25

Contempt:

Contempt is defined as feeling that [something or someone] is beneath consideration, worthless, or deserving scorn. Again, the root of this line of thinking is pride. When we treat instruction or the person giving it with contempt we are ultimately setting ourselves up to fail. If accepting instruction is the pathway to wisdom, then rejecting instruction must have the opposite effect.

The reality for many people is that they reject horizontal instruction (i.e. criticism from other people) because they deem that person "unworthy" to share truth with them. We judge people based on their shortcomings and therefore convince ourselves that we don't have to listen to their instruction. But if we're only willing to receive instruction from those whom we see as "worthy" then because all men are sinners, there will always be a reason for us to reject the admonishment of others.

Paul didn't say, accept the admonishment of those worthy of giving it to you. To the contrary, he simply said admonish one another in all wisdom. This means that regardless where a person is at in their own faith walk (or battle with sin) as long as they are doing so from the word of God...all of our brothers and sisters in Christ bear the responsibility and authority to give us instruction. And we bear the responsibility of allowing them the ability to do so.

One of the most prideful choices we can make as Christians, is to deny a person the ability to speak truth into our lives because we don't consider them worthy enough. Proverbs 16:5 tells us that those who are arrogant in heart are an abomination to the LORD...be assured, [they] will not go unpunished.

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. | Colossians 3:16 

Husbands: Your Love is Your Reward

Husbands, your reward for loving your wife well is not how she chooses to respond to you in return; on the contrary, your love for her is your reward!

God's word tells husbands to "love [their] wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Eph. 5:25). And here is the good news;

God gives husbands the grace they need, to love their wives as Christ loves his church. 

Therefore, it is in this exchange—God giving a husband grace the husband giving his wife love—that a husband will find his ultimate reward. If this reasoning seems circular, that's because it's intended to be. As John Piper says, "God is most glorified in us, when we are most satisfied in him."

If your hope (in loving your wife) centers on God's expectation of you instead of your expectation of your wife, you will find joy in loving your wife, regardless how she chooses to act towards you, in return. #GrowOn #LoveWell

God's Common Grace - The Christian's Fuel for Godliness

Even though some people choose to bite the hand that feeds them, God still chooses to feed them. Without the common grace that God freely gives to everyone, humanity would be completely lost physically, mentally, and morally. This is true for all people, regardless if they recognize it or not. However, this is especially apparent for Christians, because they know the TRUE SOURCE of all things in this life and the life to come, namely, Christ. Christians should be willing to do anything necessary to obtain (i.e. work out - Phil. 2:12) godliness because we know how much we need it and we know the Living God who can and will provide it to us freely. #GrowOn #TheWordSpeaks

Be Holy: A Command With Eternal Significance

Have we become indifferent to our sin and apathetic to the notion of personal holiness? Scripture never tells us to make peace with our sin, nor does it encourage us to embrace the inevitability of sin in our lives. God’s word doesn’t persuade us to give up and simply accept our sinfulness as an intrinsic part of who we are. Instead, the scriptures say that “by the Spirit” we are to "put to death the deeds of the body” (Romans 8:13). Sin should never be treated as a neutral foe, and certainly not as a friend. Sin is our enemy! Therefore, we are encouraged, throughout scripture, to wage war against the sin that remains in our lives. Holiness is not a recommendation, it's a command; a command with eternal significance (1 Pet. 1:15).

Bringing Truth to the Light

There is great freedom in bringing things to the light. When things are exposed to the light, the enemy loses his power to destroy. One of the worst lies people are convinced to believe is that there is more grief in sharing the truth then in hiding it. While it may be true that, at times, it is difficult to share the truth...the truth always liberates. When we choose to keep things in the dark, rather than exposing them to the light, it is an indication that we fear people more than God. But God will never bless a lie or a willful omission; on the contrary, truth that is known and hidden becomes judgment.

Marriage is Primarily About Jesus

For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together. | Colossians 1:16-17 (ESV)

How to Eliminate the "What About Me" Attitude.

Life By the Spirit (Adam Dolney - May, 2014)

You may have missed it the first time, but please don't miss it again. Below is the video presentation of our latest men's breakfast, where Adam Dolney shared the passage of scripture that he's been chewing on for quite some time. Listen and be blessed! #GrowOn


PILLARS Men's Breakfast - May 2014 with Adam Dolney from Alex Marquez on Vimeo.

People Desire Authentic...Not Counterfeit

"Deep down, we all desire authenticity. We may settle for counterfeit, but the illusion quickly wears off leaving us with little more than smoke and mirrors. Intentional efforts to be genuine, even if we don't look quite as polished as we'd like to, will always pay richer and longer-lasting dividends for ourselves and those who we are in relationship with." 

Some Thoughts on Holiness & Integrity

Question: "O LORD, who shall sojourn in your tent? Who shall dwell on your holy hill?" (Psalm 15:1)

Answer: "He who walks blamelessly and does what is right and speaks truth in his heart..." (Psalm 15:2)

To many people, even some inside the church, talk like David's from Psalm 15 sounds legalistic and oppressive. However, for those who love God and therefore hate sin, it shouldn't. Christians are called, throughout scripture, to be holy as He is holy. Holiness is our pursuit. Holiness is our aim. It's what we're being saved for. God is setting us apart, for his glory, to be used for his holy purposes.

Pastor and author Sam Storms makes the following statement, 

"Obedience to the righteous commands of God is easy for those whose hearts have been gripped by grace and whose lives are empowered by grace (Dt. 30:11; Mt. 11:29-30; 1 Jn. 5:3)...David [in Psalm 15] is not talking about how to get saved. Rather, he is describing what it is to be saved. These moral declarations are not conditions for acceptance with God. They are the consequence of it. Thus, David is not talking about requirements for entrance into the kingdom on the part of those outside, but about enjoyment of the King on the part of those on the inside.

In His article, The Essence of Integrity, Storm continues:

Of what, then, does integrity consist? I've listed below what I regard as the ten foundational characteristics of a person with integrity. There may well be more than ten, but I cannot conceive of any less than ten.

1. A person of integrity fulfills his/her promises. Being true to one's word, especially when doing so is costly (in terms of money, convenience, physical welfare, etc.) is a core characteristic of integrity.

2. A person of integrity speaks the truth, is honest, and does not lie.

3. A person of integrity is a person of sincerity. That is to say, a person of integrity hates hypocrisy.

4. A person of integrity manifests a wholeness of character, including kindness, compassion, mercy, and gentleness.

5. A person of integrity is committed to the pursuit and maintenance of justice and fairness.

6. A person of integrity loves as, when, and what God loves.

7. A person of integrity is humble. He/she shuns pride and haughtiness.

8. A person of integrity is law-abiding. He/she plays by the rules, both in the Bible and the law of the land.

9. A person of integrity is fundamentally altruistic. That is to say, they are committed not simply to laws and rules but to people.

10. A person of integrity manifests a high degree of consistency. That is to say, he/she is not always changing the principles on the basis of which they live, unless compelled to do so by the Bible or rational persuasion.

A Man's Legacy

Men, do you know that right now you developing a personal legacy that will continue to affect people long after you are gone? Question: Is the legacy you are creating what you want to leave with your wife, children and the world? If not, there is no better time to change that legacy than right now.

The Greatest Treasure

"As a culture, present-day Christianity has redefined spiritual maturity. The reformers knew we were saved to glorify God. We moderns live to be blessed...We're so committed to discovering and applying God's principles for making life work that we no longer value intimacy with God as our greatest blessing. We're more attracted to sermons, books, and conferences that reveal the secrets to fulfillment in everything we do than to spiritual direction that leads us through affliction into the presence of the Father." | Larry Crabb -- The Pressure's Off

A Walk Through Holy Week - Post #4

"And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground." | Luke 22:44

Matthew's and Mark's gospels say that Jesus went off three separate times to pray alone. Before he left, he asked his disciples to pray that they might not fall into temptation. Each time when Jesus returned he found Peter, James, and John asleep. Isn't that amazing? I believe we can gather two things from the disciples choice to sleep instead of pray. First, they must not have understood the reality of what was about to happen to Jesus. While he foretold of his death, their choice to sleep instead of pray reveals that they more than likely didn't understand what was about to happen to their LORD.  Secondly, the disciples inability to stay awake reveals that they were were living in the flesh. When Jesus returned to his disciples after praying alone he said to Peter, “So, could you not watch with me one hour? Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak” (Matthew 26:40-41). It was the disciple's flesh that was weak and Jesus knew that only by the Spirit could they find the strength and endurance they would need to resist temptation. And as we will later see, their lack of preparation would lead them to fall to all sorts of temptations (i.e. fear, deceit, doubt etc).

We all grow weary, both physically and spiritually, but just as he did for Jesus...the Holy Spirit is able to provide us the strength to endure even when our bodies physically can't do it on their own. Christ, found himself at a point of extreme agony. So what did he do? He prayed. Luke's gospel tells us that his sweat became like "drops of blood" falling to the ground. If anyone needed rest, it Jesus. And yet he knew better. He knew what he needed most could not be found in the comforts of physical rest. The strength Christ needed to endure "the cup" set before him could only be found in God himself...so he prayed.

And what can we take from Jesus' prayers? According to Matthew, the first time he prayed he said, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me” (Mark 26:39). His desire was for God to provide another way. Jesus knew what he was about to endure. It was for this purpose that "Word became flesh and dwelt among us" (John 1:14). Christ came to die, but it was not death which caused Christ such agony. It was something far worse than death. Something Christ had never endured for all of eternity. Separation from his Father. Christ knew he would be taking on the wrath of God, that the sins of the world would be placed upon him. He also knew that because of sin, he would be separated and the loneliness and anguish of that separation would be far more than Jesus' physical body could handle. But the cup couldn't pass from Christ. This was the only way sin and death could be defeated and God's justice satisfied. So, instead of removing the cup from Christ...God sent an angel to come alongside Jesus to strengthen him (Luke 22:43).

Realizing that "drinking the cup" was the only way to reconcile a relationship between God's and man, Christ's second prayer took a very different tone. The second time he prayed he said, “My Father, if this [cup] cannot pass unless I drink it, your will be done” (Mark 26:42). The prayer was no longer relief from the agony, but instead that God's will be done. Christ's situation didn't change, but his perspective did. No longer was he left with simply agony. The angel of the LORD had given him strength to endure, and to see and embrace the future grace and glory. This was God's will, and Christ desired to live and die for his Father's glory.

"Jesus did not go on praying for the cup to pass. He went on praying for success in drinking it." | John Piper

Evidently, by the time Jesus was done praying in Gethsemane, the Father had not only made clear that there is no other way than the cross, but also that this way would succeed. The Lamb would have the reward of his suffering. He will “see his offspring; he will prolong his days; the will of the Lord will prosper in his hand. Out of the anguish of his soul he will see and be satisfied” (Isaiah 53:10–11).

Surely this is why Hebrews 12:2 could say, “For the joy that was set before him he endured the cross.” Beneath the terrors of present agony was the taste of future joy. The angel had come, “strengthening him” — clarifying, confirming, connecting the coming joy. -- source: DesiringGod.com

True Christian Community

True Christian Community (koinonia) says, "I gladly lay down my rights...for your good."

I probably don't have to tell you this, but I'm going to anyway. We are selfish people! Now, before you get offended let me take ownership of my own self-centeredness. We can try to hide behind our "goodness" but deep down if we're willing to be honest with ourselves we have a constant desire to get what we want, and more often than not that desire comes with an expectation that other people meet our needs.

So here's the rub. When you look at your life and, more specifically, your relationships are you in them primarily for what you can give or what you can get? Now before you too quickly provide the cookie-cutter answer that you know is "right" take a moment to dig a bit deeper to find the real answer. It is my personal belief that if (and it is a big if) we are willing to be honest with ourselves our focus in our relationships is usually centered on our needs and desires being met instead of meeting the needs and desires of others. You don't believe me? Here's a quick test. Think back to your past (3) arguments and then answer these questions:

1. What was the argument really about?
2. Did I have expectations of the other person that weren't met?
3. Evaluating the emotions I was feeling at the time, what was the primary emotion behind them?

Again, if we're willing to be honest...I believe our answer to these questions will prove that most of the time it is selfishness that drives the negative interactions we have with others.

For those of you who may still be lost, let me try to make the connection for you. Picture this: a man comes home from work to a house that's less than clean and kids that are going crazy. His wife asks him how his day was and with a shortened tone of voice he responds, "fine." You see where I'm going with this right? More than likely you've been on one side or the other of these types of interactions a hundred times of more. So why was his response back to his wife, short? Was it because he always talks in one word sentences, or was it because his expectation of a clean and less rambunctious house wasn't met? Only he knows the answer to the question, but I'm hoping this analogy helps connect some dots for you.

But for Christians, this way of "doing business" ought not be the case. As Christians, we are not living in relationships built on contracts which say, "if you do this for me then I will do that for you." Instead, we are living in covenantal relationships which say, "I gladly lay down my rights for your good and God's glory." This means that even if others are not meeting our needs, we live in such a way that we strive to bless them and encourage them. This means that even if Christ gave us the freedom and liberty to do certain things (i.e. drink a beer, eat bacon, watch R rated movies or hang out at the beach) if these things cause our brothers or sisters to stumble in the faith, then as a blessing to them...we choose not to partake in these things. It's an intentional effort to live selflessly for the blessing and encouragement of others. This is how Christ lived among his disciples, this is how his disciples and the apostles encouraged the early church to live, and this is how local churches are still called to live, today.

May the words from John Piper and the audio clip from Matt Chandler (below) be the hammer and chisel we need to help us kill the the sin of selfishness that remains in our lives and hearts. May we learn to find joy in living for God's glory and the blessing of others, even at the expense of our own freedoms and expectations.

"The root of our sinfulness is the desire for our own happiness apart from God and apart from the happiness of others in God. All sin comes from a desire to be happy cut off from the glory of God and cut off from the good of others." | John Piper

Jesus. The Cure for Addiction.

"When Jesus becomes your treasure, nothing else will ever satisfy you again."

How do you overcome a pornography addiction? Believe it or not, it's not by finding the perfect method to modify your behavior. It really comes down to one simple thing...finding your satisfaction in Jesus Christ.

When we love Jesus more than ourselves, we begin to develop a love for the things he loves and a hatred for the things that he hates. This will include the sins that we have been enslaved to for years or even decades. The liberty Christ offers to us isn't simply the ability to remove sin from our lives. It's far greater than that brothers. Jesus not only helps remove the worldly pleasures that we have so easily accepted and settled for, he also fills those voids with what we were created to find our ultimate satisfaction in, namely himself.

If you truly desire to be set free from the chains of addiction...don't focus your attention on the behavior itself but instead invest your time, energy, and effort into Jesus Christ. When Jesus becomes your treasure, nothing else will ever satisfy you again.

The Good News of the Gospel

 The good news of the gospel is this: God confronts our primary problem (sin) and offers us the only sufficient solution, namely his grace purchased by the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

The (12) Minute Challenge

Gentlemen:

I have a challenge for you. Give me (12) minutes of your time by choosing to listen to the sermon clip below, from Matt Chandler, and then try to convince me that you've spent 12 better minutes today.

Ready, set, go!

The Disappearance of Discipline

"We must face the fact that many today are notoriously careless in their living. This attitude finds its way into the church. We have liberty, we have money, we live in comparative luxury. As a result, discipline practically has disappeared. What would a violin solo sound like if the strings on the musician's instrument were all hanging loose, not stretched tight, not disciplined? " | Author: A.W. Tozer

Winning our Brothers Back

"Every conversation about sinfulness and rebellion against the Lord that calls people to repent is about winning our brothers back. It's not about being right. It's not about justice. It's not even about being justified. It's about concern for the soul of our brother and sister that would make us enter into an uncomfortable situation and risk the relationship for the reward of winning our brothers and sisters back, because in light of eternity, this confrontation is of utmost importance." | Matt Chandler